Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.
What do you call a bunch of tractors parked in front of a McDonalds on Friday night in Iowa?
Prom.
What has 99 legs & 49 teeth?
The front row at a Willie Nelson concert.
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“What’s your son going to be when he graduates?”
“An old man.”
“I see you went crazy at the big holiday clearance sale,” Yolanda comments, as she looks at all the bags of merchandise her friend, Weezie just brought home from the mall…
“You got that right … I almost bought their elevator ’cause it was marked down.”