Daily Archives: January 1, 2015

Punch Lines

A blonde with two burnt ears went to the doctor, who asked what had happened. “The phone rang, and I accidentally picked up the iron.” “What about the other one?” “They called back.” I met a girl whose breasts were … Continue reading

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Control Of Your Wife

There were three guys talking in the pub. Two of them are talking about the amount of control they had over their wives, while the third remained quiet. After a while one of the first two turned to the third … Continue reading

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Things To Think About…

How come wrong numbers are never busy? Do people in Australia call the rest of the world “up over”? Does that screwdriver belong to Philip? Can a stupid person be a smart-ass? Does killing time damage eternity? Why doesn’t Tarzan … Continue reading

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Stowaway

A depressed young woman was so desperate that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean. When she went down to the docks, a handsome young sailor noticed her tears, took pity on her, and said, … Continue reading

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Playing it Safe

A man in his 40’s bought a new BMW and was out driving on the interstate at top speed when he suddenly saw flashing red and blue lights behind him. “There’s no way they can catch a BMW,” he thought … Continue reading

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Right For The Job

Looking for just the right employees? Try this simple personnel test. Take the job applicants and put them in a room with only a table and two chairs. Leave them alone for two hours, without any instruction. At the end … Continue reading

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The Zoo

One day an out of work mime is visiting the zoo and attempts to earn some money as a street performer. Unfortunately, as soon as he starts to draw a crowd, a zoo keeper grabs him and drags him into … Continue reading

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The Parrot

A lady was walking down the street to work and she saw a parrot on a perch in front of a pet store. The parrot said to her, “Hey lady, you are really ugly.” Well, the lady is furious! She … Continue reading

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Anthropocene

PRONUNCIATION: (AN-thruh-puh-seen) http://wordsmith.org/words/anthropocene.mp3 MEANING: (noun), The geological period marked by a significant human impact on climate and the environment. ETYMOLOGY: From Greek anthropo- (human) + -cene (denoting a geological period), from Greek kainos (new). Ultimately from the Indo-European root ken … Continue reading

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In Your Dreams

A young single guy finds himself stranded on a deserted island. As he washes ashore, he sees a women passed out in the sand. Able to perform CPR on her, he saves her life. Suddenly, he realizes that the woman … Continue reading

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